Switched

okay yep i found livejournal.com ^.^ so long blogger * http://twiggzy.livejournal.com/ * thats my link

Summer vacation

Just started like 2 days ago...And im already bored outta my mind... But tommarow is my boyfriends day off and we have some running around to do.. First to the post office to mail out the cat statue i sold on eBay. Then to go look at apartments. WOOT the house is so quiet now that my moms out of it for awhile. The stress seems to melt away when she is not around.
I am sleeping to late tho i haven't been getting up till like 4 everyday..so my eyes have been pretty sore. OH and also i have cut soda out of my life for the second time. I hope i stick to it this time...

Cover to Cover

The last novel i read cover to cover was the last of 12 books of the cirque du freak series and it was of course insane and ended on a whole different note than when it started..when it started it was more of a vampire circus freak book but ended after 12 freaking books on more of a theory of life and how time travel works and all sorts of hat nonsense which could fry your brain thinking about. in other words. LOVE Darren shan one of my favorite authors and now that i finally finished the cirque series i am planning on starting to read the Demonota series.

Sorry Becky but twilight will never be in my book category...Ugh

So school is almost out!!! I can't wait for summer to officially be here, I need a break from the school stress and junk that comes with it. Plus i will have more time to job hunt. In 4 days my mom leaves for Cali and that couldn't come quick enough. It seems like right before she goes on vacation she gets that much crazier and it bugs me that much more. Yesterday she was in crazy bitch mode for most of the day. i wanted to scream and go find somewhere else to go. but i sweated it out by ignoring her the best i could and focused on whatever i was doing on the computer. When people first meet my mom they think she is really cool and I'm just a whiny teenager about her but. Everyone i know who has spent more than a month in my house knows I'm not being dramatic. They all see her for the psycho she is. and then apologize to me for doubting me. I know she has issues with my dads death and the mood swings caused by the morphine being constantly pumped into her. but i mean my god there is a line. it got so bad yesterday with her trying to yell at either me or my sister we actually teamed up in a way and refused to comment on the other one. Which never happens. BC we hate each other remember. That's why i know she is getting bad...

On top of that josh had another emotional episode not last night but the night before. Like he cant take life anymore and i really don't know why. It instantly gets on my nerves and i wish he would quit acting like he is or go somewhere else. Like seriously i love him to death but if he keeps that up i cant deal with it. I have problems of my own and i don't need to worry about him killing himself over nothing. like he doesn't even know why he is upset. i know HE has issues with my ex but everyone does. Not just him i have them ten times that with my ex and i don't act like that...Well at least as dramatically out in the open as he does. when he got home from work he told me "make me leave" i was like wtf why?? he said he didn't know...UGH i hate relationship issues. And weirdly enough wen watching hes just not that into you i realized i have never been dumped.? do i have commitment issues?? i know my relationships normally last pretty long time. but I'm starting to wonder...That scares me i don't want commitment issues i have enough already!!!!!

Just a Crazy %^#&%

So Yesterday was pretty okay i ended up missing and not watching the rest of E3, but from what i have read it wasn't much to see, once gain Microsoft dominated E3 and i sense another bill gates take over. so i surfed the web played around with some pix and was pretty chillin. For some reason cleaned my room YAY i have a floor again! when my mom came home she said she had something for me and turns out she got me the sims 3! totally wasn't expecting that. she had told me the night before she wasn't going to get me that. So i stayed in one spot till 11:30 when josh got home then i switched to my room with the laptop and continued playing the sims.. What a laid back game. ^.^
When i was finally starting to drift asleep josh decided he wanted to have a serious conversation. I was instantly grumpy and said some harsh things which ended in us finally falling asleep at like four in the morning. I love him to death but i mean you cant expect me to be civil at 3:30 in the morning. With school in the morning! Now today he has been in a weird mood all day..I wanted to tell him i didn't want to destroy him mentally because i tend to do that t everyone i know, and if i got to much to handle i wouldn't hate him if he decided to leave. Not saying i wouldn't be heart broken but i know i Have issues and i can be almost impossible to be around. I cant tell Reality from what i make up in my head, I space on very important things, I hear voices at times which puts me in a very distant state, and i can cut myself off emotionally from people instantly and not feel bad about it. I KNOW i have issues and im tired of those things affecting people around me. But i couldn't get it out to him that i wouldn't hate him if he chose that. But i don't wanna lose him and It would suck...basically so i kept my mouth shut.

So im very tired from not getting a whole lot of sleep last night and will greatly appreciate not having school tomorrow so i can sleep!! <3

Pixar and Females

What movies from your childhood have stuck with you? Who did you admire or emulate? Are there female heroes for girls to emulate? Why are most women secondary characters? Why does that matter to you?

The movies from my childhood are of course the Disney movies.. Not so much the new fangled Disney crap but the old school Movies walt Disney himself worked on. my favorites are like Alice in wonderland sleeping beauty and Aladdin ! i love you those movies and can probably quote so many scenes from them! yes i know the sexual undertones in most of the them but i was a kid and didn't notice now i do and giggle. but the Disney movies are by far the greatest kids movies...I will keep them as best i can and show my own kids the same ones. They wont be subjected to the Hannah Montana and new school Disney. I don't want that for them i want innocence .

yeah there are female heroes but most are princesses. That does get annoying. . Even Alice in Alice in wonderland is actually a princess it specifies that in the beginning..I never wanted to be a princess when i was younger and never really gave it a second thought..but now..What the EFF?? totally not fair.. I do think pixar has had some great movies and it would be nice to see a female not a princess be the main character but it wouldn't hurt my feelings none either if they didn't do a movie like that.

even if you don't like video games that much you have to watch this!!!

E3 2009

E3 is a big convention that happens once a year where all the major companies and not to major company's in the video game world come to gather and showcase what they have to offer the next year or couple years that will up there company as best that could. A couple of the more major company's such as Sony Microsoft Nintendo EA get there own hour or so in the spotlight to talk about what they have to offer. In other words its a gamers dream if your a hardcore one like myself. Yesterday was Microsoft's Spotlight and just Floored the people with a couple new game releases and A new thing called Project NATAL (NA-Tall) which basically will make the Nintendo WII worthless and kick Sony pretty hard, Nintendo and SONY have today to spotlight and im kind of curious on what they are gonna do to try and counter Microsoft blow. Oh did i mention its slightly competitive? well NATAL is just incredible. Like if it gets done the way it is portrayed it will literally REVOLUTIONIZE the gaming industry. When i get home i will be posting a video trailer of it.. So yep Look for it !! also with an update on what Sony had to offer. Nintendo im not really excited for.

Will i break the silence?

Honestly..No i wont, I have my own life to worry about.. Might sound cold but i don't have money to do anything i don't know any of them. I have to worry about where im gonna live and how i am going to survive.. I just cant find it in my heart/mind to care or take a second thought besides oh that sucks. I even found it hard when Katrina hit to say that i cared. No i take that back i felt really bad about the animals left behind..

but anyways yes i plan on keeping up with my blog after the class and hopefully finding more readers. Might have to find somehting better to talk about than my personal issues all the time. Read around on the web for articles to rant on and comment. :D

Social Networking Fakes

How frequently do you witness things like cyber bullying or identity theft, as mentioned in the story?

Oh i witness things like that happening all the time more on myspace than on face book and other social networking sights, Ive seen people get there pics stolen and even had my picture stolen when my ex had a fake myspace made about him to insult him, Cyber bullying happens so much on myspace they call them myspace gangsters because they only talk hard on myspace, I mean people can avoid having there pictures stolen though you can set your mysapce so only people on your friends list can view it. And if you have like a music page and you want random people to see it you can set just your pictures to private. So its avoidable. if they do steal it you can just report them and myspace will delete it.. SO i don't know its not really a big deal, and if your getting myspaces made about you insulting you and spawning on rumors. well rumors spit from a sliver of truth so..yeah i don't know where i was going there...so yep .

So i broke down over the weekend or sometime and made a new myspace...i still hate the site but boredom does things to you..I might have mentioned this before but i don't usually go back and recheck my blogs. any ways i also made an eBay and put a statue of mine up there hoping i make some moneys off of it. So far i only have 1 person watching it. and makes me kind of sad. But you know whatever if i don't make any money i can hopefully decide not to sell it or like end it early lol I'm horrible!

On Friday i think it was i had yet another panic attack and told josh i was feeling like i should be committed i cant take this stress any more. My moms pills went missing again and this time my sister was THE ONLY ONE IN THE HOUSE me and josh were with her. So she had a long fight with my sister trying to get her to confess to taking the pills. She refused to and swore it wasn't her. Blaming of course josh. So my mom called a nurse to see if she could get Shelby drug tested to vicoden (opiates). While she was waiting for the call back from the nurse she called her my aunt for help on what to do. Now take it i am not very fond of my aunt she is very one sided and just a bitch.. Of course my aunt was not helpful at all saying she wouldn't blame Shelby she is too good of a kid it must be josh. UGH don't people know the majority of teens who pop pills and such are the 'Good' ones. I'm the misfit the bad kid the screw up and i never popped prescription pills. So the nurse called back. Nope they cant test her without consent it takes away her right as a human...WHAT THE EFF?? so minors can abuse drugs and get away with it. Steal and such but cant be tested BC it takes away there human rights.? what if she OD'S? then what? Do we slap them? idk. OH also the nurse says there is no such test to test for vicoden or opiates..MY ASS i know that they exist. SO my other aunt from cali calls to see what was going on. now she is suspcious of josh bc she has only met him like once. So thats understandable but she also says that those tests exist because she just had one done on her youngest son. She just bought them from s store. So my mom i guess is gonna go by two because there like 50$ and give one to my sister and one to my Boyfriend. I dont get one done because i wont even take an advil much less a huge ass vicoden so she is positive it isnt me. Which is not. I think I'm going to die from tiny pills huge one HA. Of course once my sister hears this she throws a fit. NO you should give her one too! i just wanna punch her in the face. We all know its you. just admit it...UGH i need to get away.


So in lighter terms my mom and my sister are going to California on the last day of school for 2 weeks. I didn't want to go I'm not a Cali person and when they go on vacation i try to stay and have a vacation from them! while they are out of town me and josh are gonna go look around at apartments and go to valley fair! yay, and hopefully get to see my brothers chill with them for awhile. Yep

Politics and parents

Who do you think shapes the other more powerfully and permanently- kids impacting parents or the other way around?


Okay as most of you know from just being around me in the time of year when elections roll around. I am on the right side of things. Yep a republican deal with it, And this article actually kinda pissed me off. I'm not the usual one to point out things such as sexism but my god this article is riddled with it.. Examples : "become more sympathetic to the ‘female’ desire for a… larger amount for the public good." so when is it a females desire for public good? "a mother with sons becomes sympathetic to the ‘male’ case for lower taxes and a smaller supply of public goods" so what males dont care about the public good now??
and so forth there are a couple of things. but i mean since when are females more liberal?? And in the original question no i don't think Children influence there parents more i think the parents influence the children more BC seeing and hearing there parents political views and knowledge and lack there of imprints or becomes just how it is too kids. Kids might talk a lot about politics and blah blah blah but they just don't know a lot, The media and such influences THEM a lot and swerves there views. parents are not so easily swayed at times by the media.