Summer

Well i almost forgot about this blog.. But this summer has been dragging.. 1st my a/c unit broke and we didn't get it fixed until a week ago. It was so hot one day the butter melted all over the counter! but now its all nice and cold, i have been job hunting relentlessly and haven't had any luck as of yet. I mean i have been at it for almost a damn year now...UGH im to the point of going screw it and let one me..lolz
But i have been making a little money here and there. i have started making synthetic dreads at the start of the summer and sold one set so far. they take forever to make so they come by pretty expensive but are SO worth it, the technique is super complicated to prefect and i believe i am getting there :)



those are the set i made for Myra she is getting them at a pretty big deal but just because they are my 1st set, she is really lucky but i don't think she see's that lol

So my mom has been gone a lot over the summer but i don't mind it gives her a chance to be out and about and gives me a break from her -haha-
The state fair is coming up soon and that is always my favorite part of the summer and also School!! omg i miss creative arts, i get so bored during summer and it gets to the point where i miss school soo much lol gives me point to my life to have somewhere to go and things to do. i cant wait!! and the fact that i have ordered and awesome dread kit from a great Seller, i should have them installed by the start of school or soon after :) i got them on a deal that would normally cost me 150 $ and i got them for 76$ <3 yayness! i might buy some accent dreads from her if they arent enough for my head.
I also chopped all my hair off!!!



what ya think :)

Switched

okay yep i found livejournal.com ^.^ so long blogger * http://twiggzy.livejournal.com/ * thats my link

Summer vacation

Just started like 2 days ago...And im already bored outta my mind... But tommarow is my boyfriends day off and we have some running around to do.. First to the post office to mail out the cat statue i sold on eBay. Then to go look at apartments. WOOT the house is so quiet now that my moms out of it for awhile. The stress seems to melt away when she is not around.
I am sleeping to late tho i haven't been getting up till like 4 everyday..so my eyes have been pretty sore. OH and also i have cut soda out of my life for the second time. I hope i stick to it this time...

Cover to Cover

The last novel i read cover to cover was the last of 12 books of the cirque du freak series and it was of course insane and ended on a whole different note than when it started..when it started it was more of a vampire circus freak book but ended after 12 freaking books on more of a theory of life and how time travel works and all sorts of hat nonsense which could fry your brain thinking about. in other words. LOVE Darren shan one of my favorite authors and now that i finally finished the cirque series i am planning on starting to read the Demonota series.

Sorry Becky but twilight will never be in my book category...Ugh

So school is almost out!!! I can't wait for summer to officially be here, I need a break from the school stress and junk that comes with it. Plus i will have more time to job hunt. In 4 days my mom leaves for Cali and that couldn't come quick enough. It seems like right before she goes on vacation she gets that much crazier and it bugs me that much more. Yesterday she was in crazy bitch mode for most of the day. i wanted to scream and go find somewhere else to go. but i sweated it out by ignoring her the best i could and focused on whatever i was doing on the computer. When people first meet my mom they think she is really cool and I'm just a whiny teenager about her but. Everyone i know who has spent more than a month in my house knows I'm not being dramatic. They all see her for the psycho she is. and then apologize to me for doubting me. I know she has issues with my dads death and the mood swings caused by the morphine being constantly pumped into her. but i mean my god there is a line. it got so bad yesterday with her trying to yell at either me or my sister we actually teamed up in a way and refused to comment on the other one. Which never happens. BC we hate each other remember. That's why i know she is getting bad...

On top of that josh had another emotional episode not last night but the night before. Like he cant take life anymore and i really don't know why. It instantly gets on my nerves and i wish he would quit acting like he is or go somewhere else. Like seriously i love him to death but if he keeps that up i cant deal with it. I have problems of my own and i don't need to worry about him killing himself over nothing. like he doesn't even know why he is upset. i know HE has issues with my ex but everyone does. Not just him i have them ten times that with my ex and i don't act like that...Well at least as dramatically out in the open as he does. when he got home from work he told me "make me leave" i was like wtf why?? he said he didn't know...UGH i hate relationship issues. And weirdly enough wen watching hes just not that into you i realized i have never been dumped.? do i have commitment issues?? i know my relationships normally last pretty long time. but I'm starting to wonder...That scares me i don't want commitment issues i have enough already!!!!!

Just a Crazy %^#&%

So Yesterday was pretty okay i ended up missing and not watching the rest of E3, but from what i have read it wasn't much to see, once gain Microsoft dominated E3 and i sense another bill gates take over. so i surfed the web played around with some pix and was pretty chillin. For some reason cleaned my room YAY i have a floor again! when my mom came home she said she had something for me and turns out she got me the sims 3! totally wasn't expecting that. she had told me the night before she wasn't going to get me that. So i stayed in one spot till 11:30 when josh got home then i switched to my room with the laptop and continued playing the sims.. What a laid back game. ^.^
When i was finally starting to drift asleep josh decided he wanted to have a serious conversation. I was instantly grumpy and said some harsh things which ended in us finally falling asleep at like four in the morning. I love him to death but i mean you cant expect me to be civil at 3:30 in the morning. With school in the morning! Now today he has been in a weird mood all day..I wanted to tell him i didn't want to destroy him mentally because i tend to do that t everyone i know, and if i got to much to handle i wouldn't hate him if he decided to leave. Not saying i wouldn't be heart broken but i know i Have issues and i can be almost impossible to be around. I cant tell Reality from what i make up in my head, I space on very important things, I hear voices at times which puts me in a very distant state, and i can cut myself off emotionally from people instantly and not feel bad about it. I KNOW i have issues and im tired of those things affecting people around me. But i couldn't get it out to him that i wouldn't hate him if he chose that. But i don't wanna lose him and It would suck...basically so i kept my mouth shut.

So im very tired from not getting a whole lot of sleep last night and will greatly appreciate not having school tomorrow so i can sleep!! <3

Pixar and Females

What movies from your childhood have stuck with you? Who did you admire or emulate? Are there female heroes for girls to emulate? Why are most women secondary characters? Why does that matter to you?

The movies from my childhood are of course the Disney movies.. Not so much the new fangled Disney crap but the old school Movies walt Disney himself worked on. my favorites are like Alice in wonderland sleeping beauty and Aladdin ! i love you those movies and can probably quote so many scenes from them! yes i know the sexual undertones in most of the them but i was a kid and didn't notice now i do and giggle. but the Disney movies are by far the greatest kids movies...I will keep them as best i can and show my own kids the same ones. They wont be subjected to the Hannah Montana and new school Disney. I don't want that for them i want innocence .

yeah there are female heroes but most are princesses. That does get annoying. . Even Alice in Alice in wonderland is actually a princess it specifies that in the beginning..I never wanted to be a princess when i was younger and never really gave it a second thought..but now..What the EFF?? totally not fair.. I do think pixar has had some great movies and it would be nice to see a female not a princess be the main character but it wouldn't hurt my feelings none either if they didn't do a movie like that.

even if you don't like video games that much you have to watch this!!!

E3 2009

E3 is a big convention that happens once a year where all the major companies and not to major company's in the video game world come to gather and showcase what they have to offer the next year or couple years that will up there company as best that could. A couple of the more major company's such as Sony Microsoft Nintendo EA get there own hour or so in the spotlight to talk about what they have to offer. In other words its a gamers dream if your a hardcore one like myself. Yesterday was Microsoft's Spotlight and just Floored the people with a couple new game releases and A new thing called Project NATAL (NA-Tall) which basically will make the Nintendo WII worthless and kick Sony pretty hard, Nintendo and SONY have today to spotlight and im kind of curious on what they are gonna do to try and counter Microsoft blow. Oh did i mention its slightly competitive? well NATAL is just incredible. Like if it gets done the way it is portrayed it will literally REVOLUTIONIZE the gaming industry. When i get home i will be posting a video trailer of it.. So yep Look for it !! also with an update on what Sony had to offer. Nintendo im not really excited for.

Will i break the silence?

Honestly..No i wont, I have my own life to worry about.. Might sound cold but i don't have money to do anything i don't know any of them. I have to worry about where im gonna live and how i am going to survive.. I just cant find it in my heart/mind to care or take a second thought besides oh that sucks. I even found it hard when Katrina hit to say that i cared. No i take that back i felt really bad about the animals left behind..

but anyways yes i plan on keeping up with my blog after the class and hopefully finding more readers. Might have to find somehting better to talk about than my personal issues all the time. Read around on the web for articles to rant on and comment. :D

Social Networking Fakes

How frequently do you witness things like cyber bullying or identity theft, as mentioned in the story?

Oh i witness things like that happening all the time more on myspace than on face book and other social networking sights, Ive seen people get there pics stolen and even had my picture stolen when my ex had a fake myspace made about him to insult him, Cyber bullying happens so much on myspace they call them myspace gangsters because they only talk hard on myspace, I mean people can avoid having there pictures stolen though you can set your mysapce so only people on your friends list can view it. And if you have like a music page and you want random people to see it you can set just your pictures to private. So its avoidable. if they do steal it you can just report them and myspace will delete it.. SO i don't know its not really a big deal, and if your getting myspaces made about you insulting you and spawning on rumors. well rumors spit from a sliver of truth so..yeah i don't know where i was going there...so yep .

So i broke down over the weekend or sometime and made a new myspace...i still hate the site but boredom does things to you..I might have mentioned this before but i don't usually go back and recheck my blogs. any ways i also made an eBay and put a statue of mine up there hoping i make some moneys off of it. So far i only have 1 person watching it. and makes me kind of sad. But you know whatever if i don't make any money i can hopefully decide not to sell it or like end it early lol I'm horrible!

On Friday i think it was i had yet another panic attack and told josh i was feeling like i should be committed i cant take this stress any more. My moms pills went missing again and this time my sister was THE ONLY ONE IN THE HOUSE me and josh were with her. So she had a long fight with my sister trying to get her to confess to taking the pills. She refused to and swore it wasn't her. Blaming of course josh. So my mom called a nurse to see if she could get Shelby drug tested to vicoden (opiates). While she was waiting for the call back from the nurse she called her my aunt for help on what to do. Now take it i am not very fond of my aunt she is very one sided and just a bitch.. Of course my aunt was not helpful at all saying she wouldn't blame Shelby she is too good of a kid it must be josh. UGH don't people know the majority of teens who pop pills and such are the 'Good' ones. I'm the misfit the bad kid the screw up and i never popped prescription pills. So the nurse called back. Nope they cant test her without consent it takes away her right as a human...WHAT THE EFF?? so minors can abuse drugs and get away with it. Steal and such but cant be tested BC it takes away there human rights.? what if she OD'S? then what? Do we slap them? idk. OH also the nurse says there is no such test to test for vicoden or opiates..MY ASS i know that they exist. SO my other aunt from cali calls to see what was going on. now she is suspcious of josh bc she has only met him like once. So thats understandable but she also says that those tests exist because she just had one done on her youngest son. She just bought them from s store. So my mom i guess is gonna go by two because there like 50$ and give one to my sister and one to my Boyfriend. I dont get one done because i wont even take an advil much less a huge ass vicoden so she is positive it isnt me. Which is not. I think I'm going to die from tiny pills huge one HA. Of course once my sister hears this she throws a fit. NO you should give her one too! i just wanna punch her in the face. We all know its you. just admit it...UGH i need to get away.


So in lighter terms my mom and my sister are going to California on the last day of school for 2 weeks. I didn't want to go I'm not a Cali person and when they go on vacation i try to stay and have a vacation from them! while they are out of town me and josh are gonna go look around at apartments and go to valley fair! yay, and hopefully get to see my brothers chill with them for awhile. Yep

Politics and parents

Who do you think shapes the other more powerfully and permanently- kids impacting parents or the other way around?


Okay as most of you know from just being around me in the time of year when elections roll around. I am on the right side of things. Yep a republican deal with it, And this article actually kinda pissed me off. I'm not the usual one to point out things such as sexism but my god this article is riddled with it.. Examples : "become more sympathetic to the ‘female’ desire for a… larger amount for the public good." so when is it a females desire for public good? "a mother with sons becomes sympathetic to the ‘male’ case for lower taxes and a smaller supply of public goods" so what males dont care about the public good now??
and so forth there are a couple of things. but i mean since when are females more liberal?? And in the original question no i don't think Children influence there parents more i think the parents influence the children more BC seeing and hearing there parents political views and knowledge and lack there of imprints or becomes just how it is too kids. Kids might talk a lot about politics and blah blah blah but they just don't know a lot, The media and such influences THEM a lot and swerves there views. parents are not so easily swayed at times by the media.

Valley fair and DRAMA

So valley fair was awesome as it always is despite the weather i get when i go there i always have a blast, and left feeling slightly Sick which is mainly what i aim for, rush into rides and then eat until i cant move sit for a minute and rush back into the rides until i feel sick...then head home and pass out until the next day ^.^ what a nice day despite the cold wind which once the adrenaline flows you cant feel anyways, next Friday i am pretty sure me and josh are gonna go to valley fair which is gonna make me super happy because he hasn't been there and yay!

But on the flip side... The whole time at valley fair josh is texting me. He saw mike yet again but this time coming out of the police station talking to what he said looked like an investigator. So josh gets nosey and calls up someone and find out he went there to get some people caught up and out of his way for some reason that wasn't specified. SOOO of course josh is like man he is talking about me and pun. I get pissed off because you know what he has a lot of people who don't like him and he could be there talking about anyone. But josh reacts to that as if but the person i talked to says he is still on the whole Twiggy trip and it could be me he wants out of his way. But that chance is slim. I just don't get it . WHY does all my drama come from one person who doesn't even associate with anyone i know???? UUGGHHHH people suck...

I hate that you Breathe

This morning started off reasonably well, 15 minutes late to school but that was about it. Felt real good waking up this morning no dreams nothing this weekend chilled with my brothers a little, but this morning josh took the back roads down 7th street to university instead of the highway and i was looking out the window and saw someone walking up the 7th you know probably nobody special...but no i thought i was hallucinating and i just finally gone crazy and thought it was mike..but no josh starting to laugh and i was like damn it is mike. I immediately looked aright ahead and lit a cigarette praying he didn't see me. so much just slapped me in the face i have been trying to get rid of but its impossible everyone i talk to now seems to have something to say about him to me..I DON'T CARE i am trying to work my way trough the physical and emotional scars that man left on me and i don't need to know that he hangs out and face to face and tells ppl he still talks to me...So i asked josh if he saw us..And he says yeah he turned around walking and stared....MAN!! just hopefully he maybe didn't recognize me...RIGHT! goddamn epically since that dream i had when i woke up shaking i have been more paranoid out and about than normal and this just Almost broke me completely.. i feel as if im about to have a panic attack and not looking forward to the bus ride home today...OMG why am i making a big deal outta this..it was no bug deal...I just think im losing my FUCKING mind...

HOPEFULLY valley fair tomorrow will put me in a better mood and help me forget...

Woke up shaking

yet another nightmare waking me up at an odd hour last night, this one was really vivid and intense and i was literally shaking...I wonder if its BC i just never really got to talk to ne one about how i really felt and what was running through my head and my fears for the future and honestly i probably never will i don't want people to think im just complaining whining get bored and blah blah but damn that dream just scared the shit outta me....

Summer

SO the best thing about the summer coming up is no school and sleeping in late, HOPEFULLY getting a job.
the worst part of the summer is the expected heat that will come along with it mainly bc My room is the hottest in the house and even though we have a/c it never seems to work in there....gr it makes me mad but mostly it will be good AND next month i have my drivers test available for me to take and i know it all pretty good except for the fact i have yet to attempt parallel parking ahaha that should be fun.
So since i was so down yesterday and is not much perkier today the boyfriend called a whole bunch of places yesterday to see if they were hiring..what a sweetie. But this morning on his way to work his car broke down AKA my moms car which he was using to get to work, his boss came and got him because yet again my mom had something to do or was sore or lazy..I don't even remember the lame excuse she used this time. I mean she didn't even come to the dinner theatre because she had a TOOTH ache.. she spends all her time doing things for my little sister who blames everything on her gets whatever she wants and what she doesn't get she steals from my mom...JUST pisses me off so much. So i am getting to the point where i wanna slap my sister and say WTF? and do the same with my mom .. my sister cant do wrong in her eyes and I'm the fuck up. I swear i hate this.

Dead end

It feels like I'm at a dead end in life...i feel useless..I'm broke all the time, no one will hire me...and i am officially depressed there is so much i wanna do in life and i have no money to do any of it. There is so much more i would like to say but i don't wanna wine about it...So yep

Some post secrets i like

Wiki??

Okay i dont get really why we made a wikipedia account..I dont really know much about things in depth like that to contribute to the site..I just dont understand what the point is

A great book and a little rant..

So i got home watched a little of 300 and tried shrimp wonton soup and i really dont know what i thought of it so i gave the rest of it to josh who was completely wiped out from work today and fell asleep on the couch soon after he was done eating so i popped a hot pocket in the micro, Grabbed a couple of mountain dews and grabbed the book i have been working on, The on called Identical

Amazingly good book, dark and twistid as some point in these girls lives but the ending just shocked me. throuout the book you are switching between the twins perspective on life one being cold and incapable of love due to her fathers abuse the other one wanting it so bad angry her sister cant feel it and drowing herself in drugs while the cold one attempts suicide once or twice and in the end find out that the bad sister died years ago in a car wreck brought on by her dads drinking and driving which turnd her mother away fro mthe family and her father deeper in drinking and now that she has realized she is indeed one person....i dont know its hard to explain ill probably end up telling you sometime tommarow at school so be prepared...But simply amazing..

in other words I was trying to figure out how to get my itunes restored on my pc and was looking through the music store and came across a new eminem video called 3 A.M and the pic was him in a tub of blood so curiosity got me and i searched youtube and found it pretty quickly, and if you know me i always judge him pretty harshly not to say i have never liked him but i preffer his old stuff when his lyrics WERENT aloud on the radio and he went more by slim shady. But anyways the video lyrics where pretty good but his voice annoyed me. It was almost like he realized how much of a sellout he became and is now trying to get back to the old chool and it didnt seem to work.. another thing that caught my attention was at one point he had in all white contacts....If you know Anything about eminem you know his fight with the icp and twiztid, i side mostly with twiztid and the juggalos on it..But anyways THEY wear all white contact and then after i noticed that his video ver much resembled some of twiztids stuff and it kind of made me laugh..like is he for real? i hope it was coincedence but i can already tell you i am probably not the only juggalo to notice it.. ANyways heres the video just so you have some idea what im talking about. but if you dont know twizitd it wont make much of a difference

anxiety and me

Yeah we are good old friends i have had it since i can remember and i have it so incredibly bad that it cut me off socially for years without me saying a word in school to teachers, peers noone i had one female friend and a couple male friends and i was good to go but even around those friends that were like relatives i still didn't say much. social anxiety rules my life and lately i don't want it to any more. so i have been racking my brain for ways that it will go away. There are always different kind of pills but i dont see a psychotherapists, i would like to maybe but i don't know if i can afford it..So i will have to deal, I suffer from anxiety attacks every so often and i cant stand it!!
Oh and in other words my brother DeMoN called me this weekend saying that he sycked to hear about the wookifoot show at the school and he was down..AND he kept on calling me auntie..FInally i yelled at him and in mid yell i realized what he was trying to hint at...He is gonna be a dad!! the last one of the bros i thought to be having a kid. Pun has close to four kids now and none of the other bros have any that we know of so now that demon is having one i was liek WOOOAAAHHHH


DeMoN is in the top left corner and wow this pic was taken by me a loong time ago. But just for kicks
(left to right) DeMoN, Chico , gitchi (tall one in the back) TipZ (down in front) ,Baby roaches and Pun
that pic was taken waaaay back in the day before i got to creative arts and was in my party phase along with all those guys .. oh and just ignore there hands...Only pic i had of the boys i could get to at this moment..

SOO

So i got new white out contacts for the dinner theatre and i amd going tobe wearing them quite a bit so i can be completey used to them by the perormance, i think there pretty cool had some nice reactions from people. Made me laugh


ugh bad pic..
theres a better one.


but anyways my flickr projec on japan is well in my flickr and for some reason or another i cant get the pix to work right on here to visit my flicr page!!!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/twiggyrules/

OKAY?

So i posted the pix i had on flickr..well some of them and the notes i had on them didnt show up...ill have to talk to becky about it in the morning.

Travel Fantasy

So for my travel fantasy I decided to go to japan and see everything from old school culture and shrines to new, modern Buildings, technology and people! Another great reason is all there Fantastic food that i will eat...I will spend most of my money on food and clothes... such as.

Weight and healthy junk..

So earlier this year i decided to cut out soda and join a gym..well actually i was doing really good for a while and was down to mabye on soda a day and drinking vitamin water, going to the gym..But then my membership was up for the trial days and we didnt have the money to get me a full one. so i stopped going. Then i was bored and thirsty and no water around. But there was mountain dew.. my soda of choice so i gave in and is pretty much drinking it regularly now. I feel really guilty when i think about it and im sure i have regained some weight. but either way i seem to always feels bad about the way my body looks. So i wear baggier shirts and 2 pairs of pants. Even when i lost a couple pounds here and there. So yeah..i have issues with my weight and such and me being really lazy and bored most of the time doesnt help..But it could just be my anxiety..

Weirdness..

I think i got to stop taking a naps when i get home from school. I just just have weird dreams lol! but basically..My dream was i was in school but it was a different like bigger more like a college there were a lot of interns and junk taking over classes and we were watching some kind of American pie like movie but it was different. anyway the part that completely threw me off was i went on to math class and during the lesson Becky and Caleb started talking and apparently they were dating?? and i think Becky was trying to break it off and caleb was heart broken and on the verge of tears so Becky was trying to re arrange her words as to not sound like she was breaking it off..! ha! how weird was that then i woke up going What the f?
SO thats what the rest of my day was spent doing i fell i asleep when i got home woke up around 8:30 to dairy queen and was happy..Played on the xbox and got on here...Pretty awesome.*note sarcasm*

Japan stuff

SO i have a ton of pix and all that for the trip im planning...Fake planning but in any case i should be getting something from it like this site i went lurking into that has to do with japanese fashion and i fell in love with a ton of stuff on this site!! pretty spendy tho...ill save up for it!!

http://maruione.jp/en/maruionejp-hiderock-design-c-59_239.html

the link to the page so i wont forget it...lol!

WELL

So this weekend was okay kinda slow and kinda boring, i gave blood and Got really sick feeling and so i left school, and stopped on the way home got my hair did and it looks pretty good i like it. Now all i need is to get my hair of the internets. Gonna be a while though. On saturday we went to my moms best friends wedding and like always i was bored out of my mind. Left pretty quickly.About the time where the band stared up and i finished eating and downing three glasses of champagne for the toasts..aha! good times. but little tiny sips of champagne doesnt affect me at all so eh. SO i went home and chilled out.
Tried to get to the mall so i could get a new hoodie but it was closed already..bad luck for me. Sunday i woke up early to get to the damn mall and it turns out hoddies are more spendy than i remember so i guess i have to wait for more moneys . but we did get some nummy mall food and that made me happy, also me and josh pre ordred the new modern warfare for ps3 and 360 gonna be a good game.! so excited doesnt come out until november.
ON to the last thing of the day. This morning on the way to school i saw Jay walk into the plasma center across the street from shcool. Which kinda freaked me out. Jay was the guy who mike tried to stab to death and yes it was good seeing him up and alive and i do know he goes there sometimes but i cant hlp but wonder if he is still friends with mike at all..(you would have to know jay to know its a good possibility) and if he is near...But i didnt think much of it. Even tho i had yet another dream and seeing jay right after was kinda weird...But oh well i am off to try and find out how to volunteer at the humane society...which is harder than it should be.

Frusteration..!

Soooo Last night was the twiztid show and i choose not to go because i knew if i went there would be drama!!!! I was right about that a friend of mine went and my crazy ex was there looking for me and going around asking where i was and yeah yeah yeah then proceeded in getting his glasses broke and chased out of the concert.. lolz which is kind of funny but what bugs me is why he is still looking around for me at shows..the next time they come into town i am going to go and if something happens it happens but I'm not gonna miss out on super fun concerts BC I'm worried about him...

Anyways last night was another night that josh worked until 11:00 and i hate his new shift because i get sooo bored at home and I got really hurt over something that was really little, my mom came home last night and had gotten my sister and her fast food i haven't really eaten it much lately but they didn't even consider if i was hungry..No one thinks of me in my family..Is like they don't care..For some reason it just hurt ALOT i feel invisible and it makes me more self conscious and just feel bad..Not to mention i am starting to get worse symptoms of my schizophrenia..Its scares me but theres really nothing i can do but shake my head and focus my thoughts else where..I don't think most of you knew that about me but I'm mild schizophrenic and its normally not that bad but lately it seems to be worse...

But on lighter terms I am giving blood today and maybe getting my hair done if we have time otherwise I'm doing it tomorrow. But at the same time i didn't eat anything yesterday and I'm gonna be giving blood?? I'm not sure if its the smartest thing to do but i enjoy giving blood. My boyfriend is here and hes gonna be giving to!

Weed saving our economy?

So i was wondering the internets and went to msn.com...a place that you know as a good news site so things on there are usually relatively big stories...well really big on the front page i noticed a massive bag of pot and the title "A budget cure: Marijuana taxes?" SOOO i got to reading and well ill stick some direct quotes in here..but i think they are getting serious about this..
"In the early 1930s, one of the reasons that alcohol was brought back was because government revenue was plummeting," Harvard economist Jeff Miron said. "There are some parallels to that now."

"George Mason University's School of Public Policy, valued the American marijuana trade at $113 billion annually. / the federal government and the states were losing almost $42 billion a year by keeping marijuana illegal, "

"It's a very large, significant economic phenomenon, and it is diverting an incredible amount of money from the taxable economy," Gettman said."

This on is my favorite...

"The Obama administration seems to be inching toward a more permissive stance on marijuana."

SOOO basically what they are saying through out the article is it would bring alot of money back to the economy and create more jobs. The article says obama is inching towards the idea but if you watch the videos he says of course not!! with a wink wink almost feel to it. i dont know what washington is up to right now.. but I just want to know how you peoples feel abot it?? do you think it will stimulate the economy?? I do urge you to go read the article.. the link is here go read..And SHyeah...Interesting stuff


http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/Investing/StockInvestingTrading/a-budget-cure-marijuana-taxes.aspx?gt1=33002

Dreams

My dreams used to be pleasant and i really do love my dreams i look a lot into them and i take a lot from my dreams i try to remember them for the most of part and interpret them. Lately The have been tormenting me. With weird dreams of my ex boyfriend mike. Some of you may have met him in his time here at creative arts. But anyways they have caused me to lose sleep just because i don't wanna close my eyes i take it as something bad is about to happen involving him. Or..I just don't know but i don't like it. they have been going on for almost 2 weeks now and i just hope they pass soon. I wanna enjoy my dreams again. Another thing why it bugs me so much is that when i dream its very vivid and ill dream like pt 1 one night and it will continue on to the next time i sleep so when there bad they torment me.

But anyways Today i woke up a little later than usual BC josh had offered me a ride to school since he had to wake up late from work they switched his times for today for some reason then pretty soon here he has a dinner meeting with the vice president of the whole company! that could be a really good opportunity for him. Especially if he gets in good with the VP he got this meeting scheduled after his boss had decided he must meet with the big boss and made the meeting madatory for josh I'm excited for him i hope it goes well. But anyways so i got a new make up color yesterday with a target gift card i found and it is really blue and really brown i didn't put on the brown today but i did use my bright pink and blue and it is pretty cool looking i think i could do better blending and such. I feel like a nerd yesterday after i got hope from target i sat in front of the mirror and put make up on and took it off several times and it looked horrible every time. I wish i new someone who was awesome at make up or i just need better colors and brushes and such. maybe... ^.^ But in any case i cant believe its Wednesday already it feels like Tuesday...I hate that feeling like your a day ahead or behind...

Family Guy being inspirational?

Well i was watching family guy a minute ago and it was an episode where Lois got a job as a director of the local theatre group and she chose the king and i. well peter got her to let him be the producer and eventually took over the show turning the king and i into something to do with aliens robots and half naked chicks instead of Siamese children. Well yes it was funny but he completely destroyed the play and THAT inspired me to never ever do that to a play lol if that made any sense at all....

fake traveling project thingy..

im going to be picking japan. Always wanted to go there. will go there eventually and i am gonna hop all over but mainly stay and explore tokyo and kyoto !

weddings..And makeup

To me weddings and make up are very far off from each other. But For most people they go hand in hand. When i look at weddings i have always told myself i would do it one time. I dont want to bother with divorce and crazy such nonesense, Which i almost made that mistake already but i snapped out of it and relized my ex fiance was not the person he made himself out to be and the real him slipped out. So i stopped myself And found someone new i love Josh very much but after i got my heart broke and almost made that mistake of marrying him i want to take the whole marrage thing slow.

make up! I love it. i cant do it worth a crap like i said before and for some reason it always fades runs off and looks bad after like an hour of me applying it. It sucks. I love the way it looks and well i guess the more vibrant the colors and crazier the blending is the better! yep...

TOO HOT!

for some reason or another when we moved into this new house. I got the smallest room in the house. (which feels like my closet in the old house i had a big room) so it was weird at first but soon after i got comfortable i noticed that if its cold outside my room is always 10 times colder. but as soon as it gets a little warm its ten times hotter in there! i already have fans and the window open and I'm dying! and I'm a freeze baby. So i cant sleep. Which sucks because I'm so tired that my eyes actually hurt. So i decided to come on the stupid computer update you all on my smoldering hot bedroom...Which no i am actually cold that im out of there...This is frustrating me i hate my room...so much I hope i get to have the basement soon or move out.. But in other news. I heard rumors that rich is taking students to Europe next year..Now i am SO hoping i get to go.. I have always wanted to go! but money is an issue and if i go the bf will want to. which is a possibility bc he is fluent in German and has been over Europe before and can help out a lot. So maybe but money again...issue. I'm poor. On that last note. I will just be sitting on here looking at make up styles and wondering how people accomplish them and such things bc as some of you can see i Epically fail at it...Like this one i wont even attempt...I suck at life lol!!

Running with scissors is dangerous

Yes it is, that is why it is the perfect title to this movie. Which i am really trying to concentrate on. But i seem to be failing at. Normally i love this movie and would watch it quite easily but today I'm kinda spacey. The things that are going through my mind instead of this crazy movie, is basically I'm bored....I am bored with myself and i need a change. on top of that i NEED a job I'm to the point where i am sick of looking and need one. I have worn myself out looking for a damn job and i am sick of being broke. I guess i will have to drop out of the poetry slam. I Spaced the fact that i didn't write but only one piece so. Screw it. Back to the movie notes.. How old is book man anyway? There relationship seems very illegal. lolz! I find it even funnier that the shrink is allowing that to go on. Aren't they supposed to alert the authority's? But i guess a shrink that would suggest a staged suicide to ditch school wouldn't care.

here's a list of things i want done in the next month...


1. Get a job
2. Get my hair died
3. order some hair
4. Start paying back my mom
5. Start looking at apartments (found some decent ones on craigs list)
6. Give blood
7. maybe get my nails done?? That's about it.

Needed a list of things i have to get done. Make a hair appointment for Friday on Wednesday. lolz yup that's it.

Hollywood: Destroyer of literature

Why is it that every good book that i seem to read Hollywood comes along and completely ruins? The should leave books alone. Books are supposed to be left to the imagination to create the characters and how they look and sound. The reason for my rant is i just discovered in 2010 one of my all time favorite book series that i haven't even finished reading. (getting the next one tomorrow) Cirque Du freak Is being made into a movie...Which i was very excited for until i saw the actor lists. one of the main characters who i adored in the book is Named Mr. Crepsley who in the book is an 'unpleasant' but wise vampire with green hair. Buffer than hell and etc.. Hes fricken played by john C reily...

As most of you will know is will ferrell's idiot of a friend in most movies and as big of a moron as he is...If you know me you will know my grudge on will ferrell and john reilly..I fricken hate them!! not to mention there is a boy in the book being played by some chick. Im just so frustrated they are gonna mess up this book 100 times worse than they did harry potter or any other book.. I now want to punch john c reilly in the face as well as Hollywood and whoever did the casting for this movie. MORONS!

In other words along the lines of cirque du freak i recommend it to anyone into freak shows/vampires that don't sparkle like lame twilight ones and violence :)

running with scissors pt 3

When he finally arrives at the doctors house the look of the place should give him a clue that he is utterly insane. Then when he meets natalie all i see is her as a little girl in the movie thirteen doing drugs and acting crazy. She only seems to get weird parts in movies, and there would be no way i would let her put that electro shock machine on me. But i would probably try and put it on him..Be funny. I have always wondered who in the doctors family is most crazy..?

running with scissors pt 2

Okay i have been to a shrink before but i have never had one ask me about my bowel movements. i would get up and leave right then and there. that guy in this movie is more crazy than his patients. except for deidra. i would say that she is worse. most defiantly.

Running with scissors

This movie is a great one. His mom is completely nuts and he isn't much saner. slightly more so. Must be hard to watch your son grow up in that environment. with a crazy person and start to act like her as well. I would have been filing for full custody. but then again since his father didn't do that. you have to think did he even care? most likely not. His mother is not only insane but a jealous bitch. But you can tell that she completely digs fern. lolz. So busted

Scatterbrain

So last night I couldn't get to sleep i watched adult swim for a couple hours and did laundry throughout the show. Having severe anxiety issues and self esteem problems on top of that so i ended up spacing out the window for about a half hour around midnight. Then when i almost got to sleep my boyfriend started to snore really really loudly so i started kicking him. until he finally shut up and then i got to sleep. during the time i was awake i was brain storming for the poetry slam which i have yet to begin writing most of my stuff for. i have one half way done and it is turning out pretty good. ill have them done by Monday. i do seem to write my better stuff when I'm depressed anyway.

Yesterday i went to the library by my new house and got a new library card. I wanted one to get the rest of my favorite book series i have yet to read and more from that author i love so much (Darren Shan) But they only had books i have already read to i requested some of them and remembered people at school talking about A clockwork Orange and how good it was not to mention personal friends of mine talking about it randomly. SO i looked it up the had it along with the DVD so i checked the book out and Read 2/3 of it last night. I am a pretty fast reader and i Love books a lot. This book is so far amazing and i want to see the movie just to see how they managed to mess it up. But its a little difficult at first because he speaks in a made up British slang language and it takes a while to catch on but I managed to. Just an insane book. I like it a lot. Oh..Yes i do ^.^ I thought it would be funny to start talking like he does in the book..But it would sound ridiculous and no one would understand me for example the word 'rot' is used for mouth lol!

26 posts.

I only have 26 to Becky's 50 posts but i wouldn't say that was a bad thing..I wrote more than i thought i would and i really like this blog. But. anyways

write about someone that you know and care about in life (could even be you) whose life is still in process, but they perhaps have made PROGRESS.

I would have to write about my best friend Jessica Thury i have known her for almost 6 years now and i met her my freshman year at harding, she has been one of the only female friends that were really close to me and we have been through hell and back together. She went from party girl rebel to getting into a serious relationship that started out really rocky and unstable those two getting together was almost like an accident. She started dating pun who is One of my best friends i will always refer to him as my brother. They had a pretty good relationship. normal fights and off and ons but then she got pregnant and they decided to keep this one at the last second (in other words it wasn't the first time) Shortly after jessie had told everyone about her new baby on the way some news of pun having 2 other kids by two different females on the way. That didn't go over well with jessie on one of there little break ups he slept around a little and got both of them preggo. Now my goddaughter is almost one and one of the other of puns baby's was just born, The next one is gonna be here shortly. Of course blood tests are in order for the two other ones not by jessie. Then her and pun evened out. THEN her house burned down and they had to move into her grandmas house where jessie her dad and her little brother lived along with Her mother (her dads EX wife..DRAMMAA) and her aunt Barbie and her two kids. now this house is tiny and they were all packed in there. now her dad has lost his job and lost the burned down house which he was putting all his money into fixing so there just not in a good place family wise. hey just recently found a place thought away from all the people in the house but Jessie is going to be a mother again and now her and pun are broken up..AGAIN. Hes in California right now working and she still hasn't told anyone shes a mom again. Except for me and pun i offered to be there when she broke the news to her parents but i don't know if she did already or not i haven't talked to her in a couple days. She should here soon she is already showing quite a bit. I love jessie to death and i hope it all turns out for her. I'll be there to see how her life turns out.

So many plans!

I am getting so close to graduating finally and i have so many plans that I'm making! some will happen and most will not. But i am seriously thinking college. Art college and business. Even a couple business In community college where ill get my generals. Then on to art College hopefully CVA. Then While all that is happening getting my own place with the boyfriend opening a tattoo shop *cross fingers* that's my dream right there. Also i was talking to Gavin earlier and we wanna work together a lot in the future and are discussing now getting a bunch of people five or six and renting studio space to do photo shoots and a space for just random art. We could probably make it work and I haven't even gotten a chance to talk to josh about it. But i am really liking the idea especially since like studio space can get relatively cheap like 300 a month with 5 people involved it splits up nicely. Sounds like it could be a plan. I think josh will be down for it. I got some serious planning out to do. Plus during this time before the shop gets open i have to find some sort of job to help josh with money. And I have been seriously looking and searching my ASS off. Excuse the language but there are NO jobs! I have applied everywhere and then some and not even an interview. hate the job market right now. I need one so bad. its not even funny. Someone HELP! lol thank you.

Playlist

OKAY so i posted a play list with some songs that go along with my life. Some of them are more for the song title and some of them the lyrics speak my life. I added some that came quickly to my mind and ill add more later, Change by the deftones means alot to me and I love it its amazing! And Nine inch nails Hurt has a fairly long intro of nothing it starts on 0:27 i think and its amazing you have to listen to it all the way thought i think..there are a lot of songs i can relate to and i do love music . Some music more than others and i listen to a lot of different genres. But there are some i just wont listen to..Like most country and horrible music like Hannah Montana and crap. So yes listen for new songs there will be plenty.

Drawing a Blank

I think That i need to come up with better blog titles..But i am drawing a blank..Yep i think thats the title. So this weekend was the art crawl and before me and the boyfriend headed out there we stopped and had dinner at fujiya. Then i went on to make 160.00 Dollars from someone buying my painting of a geisha i did. Made my fricken night pretty much.
Then Art crawl went pretty smoothly all the money i got from the painting went into my not so pretty bank account and I got a whole 18.00 dollars out of that. Not bad but i mean jeez i got to watch what i spend..Now i have t get 60 dollars somehow and order my hair I am only gonna pay half my bf is gonna pay the otehr half and now i found some other things i want fr it like a 30 somethign dollar fringe and a 5 dollar headband..Jeez i hopei get it all..:)
Thats about it..Good weekend.. And im getting anxious about my hair...grrrrr

beauty

Beauty can be so many different things to so many differnt people. To me it can be anything from just something different..(as longas you can pull it off) crazy make up, crazy attire, lots of colors or not so many down to black only. I think the pictures im going to post will show it off more. I dont think i can go though individually and explain the beauty concepts in each picture theres a lot of beauty in each one.








(the last one here is for the beauty of tattoos) i love tattoos.

Art shows!

Yes i was at my schools art show last night being a gallery attendant i didn't have any art in it but it was interesting i didn't find it as cool as everyone else seemed to considering i have been looking at the art for weeks now, its not a bad thing i am just used to it.
I am really excited for the art crawl this weekend i have five pieces in it four photography and 1 painting i just finishes of a geisha girl coming out of the Japanese character for beauty. I think it turned out good i don't really wanna sell it but i did put a ridiculous price on it like 300$ i think if someone buys it they are cray b/c its not that great, but if someone buys any of my work i would defiantly feel happy and a mix of emotions that someone actually thinks i my work is good and i wouldn't be able to explain it. plus i would have some moneys!! lol that always helps i am gonna be running around the art crawl a lot. i have fun there and its something to do that i can get out of the house. The boy friend got paid today so after school we are going to Fujiya in downtown saint Paul and then off to the art crawl if i get don there to early i will see if i can help set up if needed. So! that's that.

Random thoughts through my head

I am pretty sure the weather for today was a bunch of crap. It doesn't look very much like 80 degrees outside but maybe looks are deceiving. I am wearing a dress today.. Yes i broke into that randomly but its a little weird considering i have no idea hat compelled me to put it on this morning maybe its because we are in the middle of doing all of our laundry and i had nothing else clean? or maybe the idea that it was supposed to be like 83 degrees outside. But in any case me and mom had a fight last night with started with her sleeping like usual waking up at midnight when i just got into bed and was in the middle of falling asleep calling me out to just then inform me. Oh you have to do the dishes now..and go let the dogs out. okay i let the dogs out that's fine but there was no way i was gonna do the dishes at 12 o clock a night. she must be out her mind. I hate how she wakes up randomly and just to yell at people for no reason. and then said as soon as josh is done paying her back we have to leave. too bad that's what we were already planning. Josh got a promotion at work and is now making pretty decent wages. I still need to get a job though. Not finding one has really gotten frustrating. Starting to piss me off and erk me a little. I have been searching furiously since i got let go from best buy i even took a bar tending course and still nothing. Speaking of which the owe me money for not placing me in a job at 30 days. I have to call them.
Also i am to the point where i hate my hair. I want to go get it done soon I need to dye it and trim it and style it and then after that i want to get some synthetic dreads that are really long and are blonde on top and fade into pink and black and i mean really long. so thats what i wanna do with my hair. I hope it all works out. I just cant decide if i want my hair done first or order the hair extentions get my hair done and immediatly put them in..I am thinking get my hair done then order the hair later..The extentions are pretty spendy liek 135$ and me getting my haircut and done the way i want it is gonna be like 100 dollars or a little more..Just cant wait..I wanted to post a picture of the dreads im ordering but the sit is blocked ill post it later

Scents that remind me...

When i was little my great grandma i think it was gave me a little beaded wallet purse thing that was blue and i held my coins in it i don't think i ever remember meeting her i was too little, but that purse smelled like a mix of coin metal and slight perfume i could never quite place. I would sit on my bedroom floor with the purse i really loved the smell of it and it just now went missing in the move from my house to this one. I was really sad i will never get to enjoy the purse again
Another smell i noticed throughout my childhood and even bow that i really love is vanilla bean so really strong vanilla i had a couple toys that for some reason smelled of vanilla i don't even remember the toys but the smell was awesome i always have loved that smell and now i have vanilla spray and lotion stuff.
The smell of Just blown out candles.. Makes me want cake and ice cream and presents. Defiantly Brings back birthday memories be my bday or someone Else's just I've the smell of blown out candles.
I actually have a lot of smells that spark memories some of them are sad like the smell of stale cigarettes remind me of my dad who smoked constantly i know it sounds like a bad smell but not really just was how he smelled. and etc etc

O.o Droolz

I am craving pizza something fierce..I wont get any but me craving pizza is on like a daily basis and its particularly bad today possibly because there is an oven in Caleb's room and i was smelling it all hour...mmmm nummy. I think we should have a contest in this class that earns us pizza..that's be great...*hint hint* ^.^

and as for earth day..This isn't gonna sound the greatest but i really cant stand it. So i am not doing anything to be Eco friendly. No a thing. Please no lectures on how we need to all pitch in and save he earth..That will make me wanna litter.. lol Sorry i have strong feelings on earth day and other hippie holidays.

My first Memory..

I don't really know what to say as my fist memory because I'm not really sure.. It could be many things, Like when i thought the kitty was being bad coming upstairs and tossing it over the really tall banister all the way to the basement 5 times until my mom caught me and let me know that that wasn't okay, i apologized to the kitty, who died a little later from feline leukemia, Or it could of been accidentally ripping off Santa's beard at the mall when we went to get our picture taken. I made all the kids cry i pretty young.
I really have no clue which one, But that just made me think of a funny story..When i was like 4 or 5 maybe six at the state fair, i shut down the whole bunny exhibit got people arrested, was on the news and got a free bunny!! I was at the bunny house at the fair and i asked the guy what happens to the Bunny's after the fair? he said they just kill them..Well I got upset and dragged my mom over to the news stand and demanded to speak with a reporter or whoever was there and told them what they did to the poor Bunny's, And somehow in the next 2 hours all the Bunny's were confiscated the people in charge were arrested and I got a free bunny! I was apparently a strong minded kid and the whole time my mom was laughing and shock that i had made that much of an impact and i was interviewed for it, It might not be my first memory but i do think its one of my favorite. After that happened the state fair is careful to make sure that the animals are not just alive for there time at the fair. And besides who would even tell a little kid that they kill the bunny's?? jerk.

Its creeping!

The fact that i haven't slept is in two ways affecting me. One me being awake and actually alive enough to do school work. and two, I am starting to get the affects of it. random stare offs into space forgetting what i was doing and trailing off in sentences. The boyfriend like i said had to get up at 3 for work today and he got a break and came during 2ND hour and brought me a soda. Nice gesture but he knows I'm trying to cut back, he is such a big ol sweetie, I took it and i will most likely drink it he knows i needed the energy today maybe that's why he did it? anyways it was a nice surprise and last night i got 10 bottles of vitamin water at rainbow for 10 bucks. not bad, I would get those those little packet things to mix in but i have a thing about saving the environment. Its not for me, opposite an environmentalist i guess you could say and nope no salt whatsoever ^.^ all good for me lolz Well off to lunch to smoke a cigarette and try and stay in this world and not drift into twiggy land...which is a place for another time to discuss.

...Can't Sleep...

This happens to me every Sunday night it seems..I cant get myself to fall asleep..maybe it's because i sleep really late on the weekends..but I'm weird and is really not affected by one night without sleep and actually makes me more pleasant on Monday mornings..My boyfriend has to wake up in 30 minutes to head to work. I will most likely get the look from him as to why i am still awake lol but if i be sweet to him i think it will be all good. Plus i have to ride the damned city bus to and from school today because of the crazy schedule the bf is on just this one day. It sucks but i do wish i had a job schedule at all..
Also my best friend dropped by with her baby my god daughter to say hi and eat our food lol. But she did manage to tell my mom that she is yet again preggo i have known the longest me and the baby's daddy my other best friend were the only ones to know for a while but she Finlay got it out to my mom..Which you might be thinking that's weird why bother with telling my mom? but my friends have been calling my mom mom since they met her lol they all think of her as their second mom and she trys to act like on too lol so thats why she was nervous her own parents dont even know yet but shes starting to show and its getting obvious she is twenty years old now? or pretty close. But there's more drama to go alog with that that i wont get into at the moment. But mabye another time. I hope i am this baby's godmother too!



That's a rather old picture of my goddaughter there. I have some new ones i will post later.*just click to see the whole thing*

Oh no! I'm slipping!

On my quest to get healthy, not really by much im still going to the gym and feeling good then, but since i cant afford the water, and soda is the only thing always in my house that's what i end up drinking because im a thirsty person. Yes i know water from the tap and blah blah but that gets boring and i need taste!! that's why i drink vitamin water and etc. but damn...I Am soda relapsing!! bad bad bad. And i need to get the doctors when i have the chance and figure out why i just don't sweat. i mean i don't mind that i don't. but the bf says its not healthy to work out and just not do it.

Just Peachy

when i was on my way home from school on Thursday my right eye hurt like i got punched in the face and i had a blk eye..now i didn't get punched in the face but a couple hours later we figured out it was a sty thingy on my eyelid its a rly small one and i thinking ts starting to go away already but it hurt! still does if i rub my eye at all but now i have to get new eyeliner or i could get it in my other eye...makes me mad..but i guess it couldve been worse
Then i found this dread falls website that i absolutely love and found the perfect ones for me, but there a little spendy. I shall get them though just have to get my hair done first so it doesn't look off color..^.^
Me and the boyfriend had a big ol fight on Thursday night and we were up all night working it out so i ended up not going to school on Friday i was just to worn out but we fixed it for the most part i cant go to bed angry at him it doesn't feel right so i stayed up. And so far this weekend has consisted of a lot of xbox time and a little gym time lolz still going but more xbox than anything. what a fun weekend!! *note sarcasm* I wonder what Jessica is up to. i haven't seen her in a while..i guess u just tend to stay busy after u have had a baby.

Why?

Do i know the people i do? i swear we have the weirdest conversations. Take note i play xbox and ps3 with these people and i do not actually hang out with them but i talk to them enough to consider them my Friends. sadly. but last night we were playing call of duty listening to my friend xeno talk about how he accidental mixed bleach and arsenic. and is now not feeling well..well duh! i swear every other day that boy accidentally almost kills himself. then somehow it got onto how platypuses are venomous. I argued the point that they were not but in the end it turns out the male ones are. they have a barb on the inside of there foot. so now not only are they the most awkward creature on the planet they can now potentially kill you. Awesome! my boyfriend is going to make a new gamer tag and it going to be Venomnous platapi...I love them so much oh but yes the conversations get weirder. sometime during all this someone mentioned they don't game with pants on and one of them brilliantly stated it is proven that wearing pants decreases the size of your genitalia. this is when i decided its tie for bed. My friends are idiots. and have the weirdest stuff on there mind but yet i get online everyday and play with the fools. yay me.

Social Learning

If there are such things as digital immigrants and native i would say i am defiantly a native since i was really young i have owned every gaming system i saw and always loved how computers worked, and keep myself up to date with the random gadgets but is every teen a native? Defiantly not, There are some teens that just don't get it they weren't raised around it or just were never interested. At the same time not all adults are immigrants some have kept up really well with the ever growing technology. I like how schools are making the Internet and technology more available in schools, APEX is a good learning tool for some but since our generation is so into the social networking world of the Internet its hard for the kids to stay focused on the APEX curriculum when they could go find a proxy and sit on facebook or myspace the entire time updating there status. I tried APEX several times and that right there was my problem its just way to tempting. So i might be Technology savvy but i don't really support the APEX system, i guess for some it works but I just really enjoy the teacher/student thing that's usually goes on in schools. I defiantly don't want the schools to eventually run just on the computers because that will make the social skills of kids go down even more.
Honestly i don't think i could go a week without technology of some kind. Without the Internet i would die of boredom, television i am not to fond of but i do like some programs i wouldn't die over it though and ipods and cell phones are a must. even if i am not using them i just need to have them with me. but i would say the one thingi need the most is my playstaion 3 or my xbox 360 i couldnt really use them without the internet so they go to geather like salt and pepper and they are my muse my savior, gives me a chance to go be someone else and get away frpm the hectic place that is my life. smiliar to acting but thats not technology.

Summer is coming!

and i really cant wait, it will almost be 70 degrees today and took this as the first opportunity to break out the shorts! and i would say that is weird because i hate shorts. This is probably be one of the few times i wear them just as a sign I'm ready from the weather! unless some weird thing in me changed and i can stand the shorts. But the more important things on my mind right now is finishing school, tomorrow I'm talking to Patrick and i swear to god i am gonna get a graduation date or month out of him because i have been trying to get him to tell me when i am going to graduate and he keeps giving me way different answers. I need to graduate get a job and move out. and then eventually i will open up a tattoo shop and be happy! well the tattoo shop is more of a dream. that i really hope will come true. one its an income and it will be mine so i have no worry of getting fired. two i don't have to wear a uniform or business casual i can be myself look and act how i want and talk about anything i want and it will put my art to some use! making people more pretty and unique! maybe before i get serious about the tat shop, i will take some general classes at a community college and include some business ones so i have some idea of what I'm doing, and then go on to to get into CVA or another art college and improve my skill and at the same time apprentice under a tattoo artist and piercer. Now that's a plan! but i will also need a part time job in the middle of all that craziness.. and get some free time for the boyfriend. My life is only gong to get crazier! cant wait! and this is one of my favorite videos on YouTube, the annoying guy that's in it does these kinds of videos all the the time *thatonekid100* i hope it shows up if u look at this at school u might have to wait till you get home to see it

Little Sore

im a little sore from the gym and i have only been going there for two days now. but its a good sore that i like, i am really going to try my best to stick to going to the gym 5 times a week if not seven, since it was easter yesterday i didnt get in the gym until like midnight and we left around 1 30, but i usually have trouble getting to sleep and i went right to bed, so its already helping me! easter was pretty boring. excpet my aunts taught everyone a drinking game to play even though noone was drinking its called the beep game and it was interesting.
My boyfriend has recently gotten his xbox back from the pawn shop and is spending all his free time playing it, lol i dont mind because i play it and the ps3 as well. i just find it funny that he missed it so much, we are pretty big gamers though, after all its how me met lol.
To top off my okay mood i noticed that my all time favorte chip was in the vending machine at school and i bought quite a few bags, spent up all my change normally i woulnt go so crazy about chops but they dont sell baked hot cheetos in stores..how lame??

My 43 things

http://www.43things.com/person/Twiggzy thats the link ^.^

Feeln Good!

so this morning was the first day i went to the gym and i have to say i have been feeling good since then, I cant wait to get back in there tomorrow or Monday. I might have to wait till Monday bc tomorrow is Easter. I have been drinking vitamin water a lot more but i still haven't become accustomed to the taste...i Still prefer mountain dew. LOL but i have kept to my soda cut down. Still drinking it though.
My aunt uncle and cousins are here from California till Tuesday its nice to see them but i didn't get to talk much, because we had a get together at the family's house and whenever i get around the cousins that are similar in age to me i freeze up and shut down almost completely i get really quiet, i really wish someone would come talk to me. but noone does so i end up sitting at a table the whole time feeling outcasted. Just wanting to leave. If someone would even take the time to have a small conversation with me i would loosen up and be more social. but that's only happened like one time in my whole life. so i just sit around quiet as ever until i get to leave thank god i know how to drive know and have the gym as an excuse!
But alas i have to go back over to my aunts house for Easter tomorrow. I hope it goes better than today.

The day off..so busy

I eneded up having to wake up at eight today so no over sleeping. and ran around from oakdale to saint paul to oakdale to maplewood and you know just about everywhere. I got new earings my boyfriend got his xbox back from the pawn shop. and my favorite is we got gym memberships to anytime fitness. I have for to wait a couple more weeks to get my hair done... bc josh has to help me out with paying the bank back i accidently went over on my check card and its quite a bit over. I went and got my certifaction to bartend a couple weeks back and they werent supposed to chargbe me until i got a job and some money in my account. but they charged me anyways and now im in trouble. so josh is helping me out..thank god for that or i would be in trouble. and now that im home for a second i gotta get ready for my grandpas 70th birthday party...yaaay a family even what a nice ending for today..*note sarcasm* i dont mind my grandpa at all i love him..but i cant say the same for everyone else that is there...okay so i really really have to stick to this gym thing. im so unhealthy its not funny, i already cut down on soda and even had a vitamin water today which tasted like crap but better for me than soda. When i finally get my hair done it will have costed a whole lot and will hopefully turn out like i want it to. Platinum blonde on the top pink underneath and pink exstentions ^.^ geez i hope it turns out. im excited!! oh and right..think gym...think healthy...ehh this is gonna be hard